Ode to Handheld Metal Detectors

If you are a promoter that is planning on holding an event where there will be any number of people attending you may want to strongly consider implementing the use of one or more (depending on the size of the event) handheld metal detectors. Metal detectors provide an effective, yet cost-effective, means of protecting the people in attendance. My love for these instruments is so great that I have written another poem to express this love and so I present to you...

Ode to Handheld Metal Detectors, A Poem by Carl Vouer

I love a good concert and also a show,
Where there are big crowds I will likely go.

I am a people person and of this there is no doubt,
I love to party, let loose, to scream and to shout.

My only concern when at a concert is this,
That nobody gets in without a stamp on their wrist.

This stamp will confirm that a security check has been run,
And nobody is sneaking in with a knife or a gun.

I love partying all night at a club that is hot,
But would much rather do so without being shot.

I would much rather spend the night engulfed in dance,
Than bleeding profusely in the back of an ambulance.

It's just so enjoyable when you have the peace of mind,
Knowing nobody in attendance is going to commit a crime.

For a promoter to ignore this most basic of needs,
Would be a critical oversight or one of much greed.

A promoter should consider security the utmost importance,
Especially to stay in most state law accordance.

A great thing about handheld metal detectors is that they come cheap,
Keep your attendees safe from harm and at night you can sleep.

Knowing you did your part to be a good host,
And not a cheap scumbag, but someone we should toast.

Most handheld detectors need no player hating,
As they are so easy to use as they are self-calibrating.

Their ultra-sensitivity makes them impossible to fool,
For attendees that come to straight act a fool.

They can detect a handgun from almost a foot,
So you can weed out a catastrophe at its root.

Whether the concert is for Donny Osmond or Slayer,
Your guests safety wont hinge on a wing and a prayer.

So do the right thing and get this handheld device,
Or something will happen and it wont be nice.

Someone may be hiding a gun or knife in their shoe,
But they'll never get in and guests can thank you.

Stay Safe,

Carl Vouer

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